Friday, 7 August 2015

Summer Jams 2015

I've not done any kind of music post, or any kind of post for that matter, in a long time, so I thought I'd give you a quick roundup of some of the albums I've been loving over the past couple of months. I've left off Nick Jonas' album because I've dedicated an entire post to it - I know, I'm full of surprises.

Miguel - Wildheart

Adorn is one of my favourite songs ever, so to say I was excited for this record is an understatement. On the first listen I was quite confused by the album because it's not got quite the same R&B sound of Kaleidoscope Dream. However, when I listened through again, bypassing the initial surprise, to properly listen to the music, I adored it. The music on this album cannot be put into any particular genre - it's that good! My favourite part of the album (so far) is the last half of Coffee, I love when Miguel does his ad libs, he gets across so much emotion in his voice, it brings a tear to my eye every time.

Listen to:

1. Coffee (my favourite song of the year so far)
2. Hollywood Dreams
3. face the sun (feat. Lenny Kravitz)

Fifth Harmony - Reflection

I've loved BO$$ since I first heard it on the X Factor last year, so I don't know why it took me so long to get the album, it's so good! It reminds me of Ariana Grande's first album Yours Truly, but with a bit more grit. I feel like saying I love every track on this album is a bit of a cop out, so I'll try to narrow it down to my Top 5.

Listen to:

1. Reflection
2. Like Mariah (feat. Tyga)
3. BO$$
4. Suga Mama
5. Going Nowhere

Empire Official Soundtrack

So it used to be that I was ahead of the curve when it came to TV, I was always up to date with shows before my friends even knew they existed, and while this has remained true to a degree (I'm looking at you How To Get Away With Murder), I seriously failed with Empire. I only watched Season One in June! What was I doing?! I mean, I do prefer to binge watch my shows, but I would've got so many more Cookie references if I'd been watching from the beginning! Anyway, in case you've been living under the same rock that I was, Empire is about a record label, and throughout the show the cast perform some really great original songs. I'm SO glad they released this album, because these songs are classics.

Listen to:

1. Whatever Makes You Happy - Jennifer Hudson & Juicy J
2. Keep Your Money - Jussie Smollett
3. You're So Beautiful - Jussie Smollett & Yazz

Throwback R&B - Various Artists

As I've mentioned countless times before, I am in LOVE Trevor Nelson's compilation albums. This isn't one of them, but when I went through the iTunes preview, it sounded like it could be, so I downloaded it. It's full of great songs from the '90s and early '00s. I've rediscovered some classics thanks to this album.

Listen to:

1. Foolish - Ashanti (always been a favourite)
2. Mo Money Mo Problems - Notorious B.I.G feat. Puff Daddy & Mase

Monday, 3 August 2015

It's August?!?!

I feel like I begin way too many of these posts with 'I'm sorry I've not posted in so long', so instead of saying that, I'm going to try and explain why. As you guys know/have inferred from my posts, I suffer with mental illness (but it seems like everyone does nowadays right?). I see the world in a different way, and sometimes this means everything is absolutely fantastic, but other times it's horrendous. I graduated from university in July 2014, and I thought getting out of there would end all my problems, but boy was I wrong. 

I was depressed all through university, for one reason or another, but thought that graduating and completing that phase of my life would end all my worries. However, moving on from over fifteen years of structured education to living 'life', was a transition I've still not got to grips with. Going from knowing what I'll be doing for the next year(s), to not knowing where I'll be next week has been more than tough. I had a job from November 2014 to March 2015, and although I started off enjoying it, by the end I wanted to kill myself. I felt like everyone was taking advantage of me, and that I was the only one doing any work. Looking back now, I'm sure I was just seeing what I wanted to see, but when you're in the moment, things can seem ten times worse.

After leaving my job I went to visit my friend in France. It was all going fine until my brain went into overdrive. For a bit of context, I'd not seen these friends since September, and although we lived together through university, and practically spent every single day together for 3 years, we'd slightly drifted apart after leaving (not really a surprise as we all moved back home). Firstly, I think I'd put too much pressure on this trip, it was going to be amazing! We were going to have the best time! Obviously thinking like this means that when things don't go amazingly, they seem all the worse. Anyway, back to the story, we all got drunk one night, and something was said that really offended me. The next day I brought it up when everyone was sober, and not only did the friend agree with what they'd said the night before, they didn't even apologise for how upset it made me. Unfortunately we've not really spoken since then, and that was in March. 

Anyway, then I got back and my dad had a quadruple bypass operation! I had to look after him for a while, but now he's fine. I think he's depressed though which is fantastic. He already has a bleak outlook on life, but now it seems like anything positive he manages to spin into a horrible negative. So, now we're in June and I'm feeling absolutely horrendous. I feel so close to just jumping off a bridge. I don't, instead I go home and start googling jobs abroad. Somehow I find volunteering opportunity in Greece, email them, and have signed up for a six week placement with them starting the following week. Sometimes I'm a little impulsive. 

Fast forward to now, and I've just come back from my six weeks in Greece. On the whole, I had a great time. I met loads of fantastic people, spend lots of time on the beach, and completely redesigned their website. However, I still had episodes of depression. It was horrible while I was out there, but it's made me realise that my illness is exactly that, an illness! It's not something I can help. Even when I'm in the sun, hanging out with loads of friends, I still manage to be sad. I've spoken to the doctor, and I'm on the waiting list to see an NHS counsellor. Hopefully that'll help.

So, the long and short of it is, I want to blog. I think. Well, I have some ideas for posts over the following weeks, and I hope I manage to write them. The pictures I've used throughout this post are just random ones taken on my phone since March. I don't have my septum ring in anymore - it fell out and I was too squeamish to put it back in! See you guys soon with about a million pictures of Greece!